So...

I keep telling myself that I need to blog again and I come and check things out, and then I leave without writing a single word. Why is that? Good question and maybe someone out there can answer it for me.

I started blogging when I was first out of work as a means to keep me busy and to, I guess, help clear my head about things. I guess my head's pretty clear now though. I love being a stay at home husband. LMAO!! Of course, who wouldn't, but I REALLY enjoy it. I don't mind going to the grocery store, doing the laundry, cleaning, dishes and all of the other things that a house husband does. Most of all, I love the time that I get to spend with the girls now. It's been almost a year since I've had to work a late night or a weekend. I can't even put into words how amazing that feels.

I know that eventually I'll have to rejoin the working world, but until that day I'm going to make sure that I enjoy this time off. For a long time I felt like I had no other choice but work like a freak of nature and make lots of money because I was a materialistic bastard. I'm still somewhat materialistic, but I have learned what I can and can't live without. Most importantly, was the realization that the girls come first and foremost and all the other stuff can wait. This time at home has definitely put the priorities in order for me. :) Needless to say, I'm thrilled about that.

Well, let's see if this sparks off some more serious blogging. Apparently there are some of you that still come here and read this so I should get better about giving you new info. Also, if you have any questions, please ask. I'm sure some of you read this and are like, what the hell man?? I'm an open book and so long as you're respectful, I'll always respond. :)

Worried

I'm worried about you. Don't tell me not to, because it's what I do. I'm here if you need me.

Can't even help it

I see her pics and I'm done. Just, done. Damn!

Old man

So it's happening. I know I've said that it doesn't bother me, and for the most part it doesn't, but I'm getting old! Yes, this is a part of life and the natural order of things, but it's always tough to swallow it when something happens that makes you realize just how old you are.

Oh, yeah and as always she's the one that's still around.

Always the asshole

Exactly what the title says.

Thank you

Just wanted to post a quick thank you to the person who got me blogging again. Hadn't been here in months and then decided that I needed to get those feelings off my chest. Blogging is def the way to go.

I miss her

God I miss Lori. There isn't a day that goes by where I don't think about her. I was just on her myspace page looking at old pics and it just hurts.

I was looking at the pics from the last vacation that we all took together. That was only a few weeks before she passed away. There are times when it hurts like it was yesterday. Like no time has passed what so ever. I can still hear the nurse say that they called it. 10/7/2005 at 2:02pm was the worst day of my life. My heart breaks just thinking about it.

She would have been 25. Still young, but gone already for 4 years. I know that everything happens for a reason and I believe that when it's your time it's your time, but losing someone so young makes me question it. Then you have to question why she would be taken when she was happy. Her friends and family all said that she was happiest the last 13 mos of her life. That was when she was with us. I don't understand why you would take someone when things are finally going well. But I guess it's not for me to understand.

She'll always be a part of my life and nothing will ever change that. I talk about her often, think of her every day. I love my tattoo of her because she'll always be by my side. That's where I want her, forever.

I love you Lori and always will. We will all be together again. I know it.