Shit...

So I was perusing Myspace a little while ago and came across someones profile who had recently lost his significant other. (I'm not sure if she was his wife or his gf) He posted an awesome tribute to her on his page, it was one of the sweetest things I've ever seen.

That of course brought me right back to the very day that Lori was taken from us. I've been much better recently. When I think of her, I try to smile every time. Every thought I have of her is a good one. I remember the laughs, the hugs, the kisses, all of the wonderful times that we had when she was with us.

Today, listening to his message to her, seeing the tribute that he put together for her, that brought back all the pain as if it had just happened yesterday. I had to relive that horrible day all over again in my head. It's something that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy and I sincerely mean that. She was three weeks shy of her 21st birthday. Yeah, that's fucked up I know.

There isn't a day that goes by where I don't miss her or think about her. That will never change. I have a tattoo of her portrait on my arm that I often touch just because it makes me feel like I'm touching her. As soon as it was done, I remember saying to my wife that she'll be by my side forever. I just miss her so much.

I know she's watching over all of us and she makes herself known plenty of times. And I know that she doesn't want to see me hurt, but I can't help it. My heart breaks when I think about how I can't hold her, talk to her, or hear her voice. Her laughter was music to my ears. I long for the day when I can see her again, hold her again. Tell her that I love her and hear her say the same thing to me.